Postpartum depression (PPD) isn’t any longer a term which is shushed up and written off. Women are now increasingly becoming aware of their emotions after a pregnancy, are accepting it, speaking out and seeking help.
And why shouldn’t they? It’s not their fault at all!
Postpartum depression is characterized by feelings of anxiety, depression, hopelessness, panic which is bought about by a combination of hormones, stress, genetics and natural predisposition of an individual.
Experiencing symptoms of PPD, or having PPD for that matter is nothing to be ashamed of, because it isn’t something which is in our control.
Almost 60% of new mothers experience PPD in some form or the other, some in mild forms while other experience more drastic symptoms.
But like with any other mental disorder, sometimes what PPD’s symptoms are can be difficult to understand and distinguish.
Below are some of the most common symptoms associated with postpartum depression.
You Worry You Aren’t Good Enough to Be a Mom
You are constantly having thoughts about being inadequate, and not being able to take care of your baby as required. You might even think that you’ll harm the baby in ways which are irreparable.
By constantly thinking negative thoughts, you have convinced yourself that you are not good enough to be a mother – maybe because you don’t like breast feeding or you didn’t have a normal birth.
This feeling is different from just feeling disappointed or sad or regretful, it’s deeper- it’s about feeling truly devastated and broken.
You Feel Like Escaping Constantly
All of us, at one point or the other have thought of just leaving and never coming back. But this feeling of escaping for good, when you have PPD is more than just a passing thought. It’s constant and it’s again linked with not being good enough.
You may feel like your family, most especially your child is better off without you since you’re anyway not a good mother and hence you might constantly fantasize about just getting away from this life.
You want to escape this feeling of being overwhelmed constantly about motherhood.
You Are Constantly Questioning Whether You Love Your Child or Not
A lot of us growing up, were constantly fed by media and books that a mother-child bond is instantaneous and all overpowering. This doesn’t necessarily have to be true - infact most mothers take some time forming a bond with their child.
But when suffering from PPD, the mother might start feeling a kind of animosity or might not want to look at the baby at all.
This of course, has nothing to do with the child but everything to do with her own hormones and emotions and bodily changes.
There Is a Lot of Guilt
You feel guilty of not feeling love, not doing enough for your child and even of being unworthy. You are constantly pressurizing yourself for feeling certain things or telling yourself you should do things which you aren’t at the moment.
Guilt, is perhaps PPD’s most characteristic symptom. Most mother’s suffering from PPD feel like they should do more, feel more but are unable to really push themselves because of overlapping emotions of confusion and irritation.
You May Have Thoughts About Self-Harm
Thoughts of self-harming or even suicide are symptoms of advanced PPD. These might occur once, out of the blue or maybe a constant stream of thought.
Whatever the case be, if you’re thinking about suicide or self-harm in any way please get help right away.
Like in the case of every other mental disorder, please keep in mind that the symptoms of one can differ from the symptoms of another.
Alongside, few of the above mentioned symptoms anyone suffering from PPD might also showcase the classic symptoms of depression and anxiety like withdrawal, crying, differences in appetite and sleep patterns.
It’s important to keep in mind that having PPD does not make you a bad person or a mother and that it is very much curable. Infact, it is the act of seeking help and wanting to be better for your child which makes you a good mother.
(Prachi Jain is a psychologist, trainer, optimist, reader and lover of Red Velvets.)
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