A healthy body, a satisfying sex life, valuing and feeling good about yourself, having peace of mind when it comes to sexually transmitted infections (STIs) and unplanned pregnancies - this is what any sexually active person can hope for. Being free to talk about sexual health with your partner and health care provider is key to your health. And it can be as intimidating as it is important. Embarrassment, dissatisfaction with treatment, negative attitudes and seeming disinterest by health professionals can all inhibit discussions.
You might feel embarrassed about the questions that you have; you might not want to admit to certain feelings or fears about your health. But getting proper advice about sexual health is absolutely crucial to help you stay healthy, and detect and treat any problems early.
Misinformation and taboos around sexual health have given rise to ‘faith healing’. Desperate patients are exploited and milked by quacks and sometimes even ignorant doctors.Dr Prakash Kothari, Sexual Medicine Expert
A huge number of men have some form of erectile dysfunction, most suffer silently.
Many suffer in silence, which impacts their marriages, social and domestic life. We can’t blame them, because, unlike in Western Countries, doctors here are ignorant and don’t know how to treat such disorders.Dr Mahinder Watsa, Sexologist
Choose Wisely
Your healthcare provider should be able to give you straightforward, nonjudgmental feedback and advice about your body and sexual life, but he or she has to start with the whole picture. And, most importantly, should be qualified! So don't even look at those sly boards or graffiti that you come across in narrow by-lanes.
Choosing a good sexologist can be tricky. You need someone who is open-minded, honest, and very good at listening. Be sure to talk to your healthcare provider about your own boundaries in terms of how they deal with your body and health concerns.
If you feel uncomfortable with your healthcare provider for any reason, follow your instinct; ask around for other recommendations. Your good health depends on your ability to communicate and rely on your healthcare provider. You might have to try more than one before you feel completely comfortable. But when you do, they will be an ally as you continue to learn more about how to remain in good health.
When thinking about how to discuss your concerns or sexual problems with your healthcare provider,
Ten Commandments
The truth is, we all have questions about sex. We also want to know how we can make it better.
The questions you may want to ask your healthcare provider can cover a wide range of topics. From changes in sex drive, dealing with sex during pregnancy, erectile dysfunction, contraception, or other issues.
There are few topics, however, that any sexually active person should be sure to discuss, including preventing sexually transmitted infections, getting tested, and more. The 10 questions below are a great place to start the conversation with your healthcare provider.
And remember: there's no such thing as a dumb question during a meeting with your sexual health practitioner.
- I am currently sexually active, what can I do to stay clear of sexually transmitted infections (STIs)?
- How can I talk to my partner about STIs? Can you give me some advice?
- I want to make sure that my partner and I get tested before we have sex. Where should I go? How can I bring up the topic with him/her?
- Given what we’ve talked about in terms of my relationship history, should I be tested for STDs/STIs? Which ones?
- How often should I be tested for STIs? Which ones?
- Are there any vaccines I should consider to protect myself from STIs? Are there vaccines that are recommended for me?
- I don’t know where to start when it comes to birth control. What are my options? How can I talk to my partner about birth control options?
- I don’t like using condoms. What are my options?
- I’ve been feeling differently about sex recently. Can we talk about what might be going on?
- Sex hasn’t been as satisfying lately. What’s going on? Is a decreasing sex drive normal after getting married?
Your provider needs to know some personal information about you to help you answer your questions, assess your risk and offer correct advice. You may want to talk to your provider about the following:
Talking about something with a qualified practitioner before you 'miseducate' yourself will definitely change what you think about sex, but it might even change your life.
(Aarti K Singh is an independent writer with close to two decades' experience in various media. Having worked in radio, TV and print media, she is now indulging in her passion to rediscover the world, besides juggling a PhD and raising her son.)
(Have you subscribed to FIT’s newsletter yet? Click here and get health updates directly in your inbox.)
(For more stories on Sexual Health, follow FIT)
(At The Quint, we are answerable only to our audience. Play an active role in shaping our journalism by becoming a member. Because the truth is worth it.)